counter public sphere

all pictures from The Everyday | EverydayNeeds

i'm still pining, i mean pinning furiously even if i have almost stopped checking the fb account where more people know me whether deeply or shallowly. i feel better. does it affirm that something about me? that i should delight in inhabiting places where nobody knows me, where i don't feel stifled? i have also begun reaching out to more colleagues offline, who aren't my friends on fb. i think some of them are on fb and maybe they think like me? a friend was sharing how she felt bad for excluding some people from complete access to her photos. i told her i won't understand because i don't have an audience in the first place. can you count the number of ironies here?

the photos above really got me. such that i'd blog a post, haha. maybe they tell me that i'm after all a sentimental fool for some distant past. i wonder if this is the mountain style. i think it's more retro, no? but not to the point of kitschy, kwim? i love the clear upper cabinets and the wood laminates (i think so because they look like formica to me). i suddenly hate my current kitchen. lol.

  

roundtable sessions

 

above images from my pinterest boards

my eyes are still on the radar for round tables that are placed in the most unlikely places. maybe it's just me, i'm a frog in a well, i haven't seen much. i initially thought most people would place a square or oblong table against a wall. my contractor also drew in one in the floor plan. but afterwards he said a round table's more versatile. fact. so we got a round glass table with a trumpet base. i used it as a dining table for the first few weeks or longer. then i played around with the layout when more furniture arrived. it's now behind my armchairs next to one wall in the living room. i've been taking my meals at a small low side table with a trumpet base on the other side of the living room. another alternative i used was to place it next to the tv mounted on the 'feature' wall. i thought to place plants underneath the table and other random stuff on the table.

old brand new

i know it's hard to envision what i'm trying to say. i'm just trying to do things the unusual way, yet i'm not sure i should bother when it's not something i'm terribly good at. do you find any of the layouts above odd? i think it's refreshing and i don't dislike it at all. but of course, right? since the stylists are experts and they can't be wrong.

cubic

i.go.blog

what's that slab of wall called? the name simply escaped me. i wonder if the materials are still available today.

the speed of things are going pretty slow on this front. work's been busy. school's starting soon. it's going to be a year of many Cs.

courage. change. commitment. 

c

the writing on the wall

via motilo's email

this wall would be perfect for the room where the clothes and shoes and bags would be housed, eh?

some updates about the house. knowing me, i was really doing nothing but looking at magazines and websites for inspiration. as always, when confronted with too many options (just an excuse), how does one decide? i can only tell you what i don't want. it's a start, but i was getting nowhere. i have a couple of contacts i could call to get things going, but i did nothing. my mother's friend's been offering to help. i'd like to reveal more but my info's limited, so long story short, i actually got as far as having a rough plan drawn up and more details should be ready in two weeks. my initial plan was to move in latest by middle of next year. this is really the worst case scenario. but now, with the help given me in this manner, i just might be able to move in by dec 2012 or jan 2013.  

in other news, i've been feeling this way again. and there'll be some changes at the office again, which means the same opportunity then would be presented again. only this time i have to make a different kind of decision. i've been putting it off but i have to do something about it soon. i can't quit my job, i need the income and especially since i have a new commitment now. i must finish school soon. before i lose more steam. what bugs me majorly is also what i want to do after graduation. i'll get to that later. i have to solve the more pressing issue first. 

i guess you can see why i was giving myself so much time to move to the new place. i hate being like this but i'm just so... fearful... i shouldn't be living life as if i still have a lifetime left to finish accomplishing the things i'd like to do before i'm taken away from this world. 

rudymentary

"One of my goals in building Metromix was to move the newspaper away from its inefficient way of putting listings in the paper which is Rudy gets a press release and opens up a file. And types in the information and next week he gets a press release, opens it up, deletes last week's, and types in another one. Awful. So we built a database for Metromix of events so that Rudy can now get the press release, type in a whole year's worth of events, and it's fielded. So every week we just do a dump from the database to create the nine zone listing for the newspaper which is localized. We've decreased the error rate in them from 12 per page to 3 per page, typos and so on. Because it's all databased, it's only typed once. Huge deal. Huge deal."

Owen Youngman
in The Chicagotribune.com: Creating a Newspaper for the New Economy (A)
by Professor Nina Ziv 

lift

"When you honour God, He will honour you."

YYH

retro gasm

attended a colleague's wedding dinner and enjoyed myself thoroughly. it's really gotta do the company, i suppose? if i hadn't swapped tables, i wonder if things would be the same. how else can i explain it other than that it's really down to who's at the table? and that'd include myself. i hope the replacement gave the group better synergy or vice versa. ironically, he's much younger than me but he can click better with the older colleagues at the original table. i'm one of them older people but not as old yet.     

i should thank the colleague who's willing to let me swap. and my boss for freeing up another spot so that another colleague could swap tables (so that i felt better i wasn't the only one to swap table... lol). anyway, this whole week it's like the central theme's gotta do with retro songs. retro cos it's more related to an older person like moi. it's like i was in my element when the conversation's gotta do with songs. songs that i know, of course. 

erm. that's it, really.  

(wardrobe notes: who wore the pants better? not me :( the socks hanselfrombasel from CofC. they're kinda wide. i almost died walking in those shoes).

ikan chuan chuan

that's a nonya dish served at Mary's Kafe. a few of us like to lunch there every once so often. i can't say it's the best peranakan place in town because i think peranakan food's popupar and generally tasty...? in the course of my recent eca work i realised that many catering companies do peranakan, and it ain't cheap.

i don't always like everything Mary dished out from her kitchen -- wonder if she prepares and cooks everything in that place... but i think it's because i can't eat the same thing too often. 

yep, the post seems to have nothing to do with my korres haul. there's a short story to be told about my korres experience. but it's nothing interesting, really. maybe another time, lah.   

闪亮夺目

missed the bling?

do not wear dress or skirt if you want people to see your underwear

black on black again

the shoes were the stars today. three colleagues commented on them; one loved them (we're both shoes people). wearing a top given by the guru. it's like a batwing top, with fins. i never imagined i'd wear something like that but thanks to her i learnt not to trust my own judgement so much anymore. haha. the jacket's also from her. i thought it's longer but i do like it even though it can look aunty-ish if not paired well. the pants were new from gmarket. they're like harem pants.

i had one of those motherofheadches last night. really hellish.

gotta run. another assignment due soon. so i may have to miss the public garden flea. i almost wanted to participate as a seller... wow, looks like i really should've done it. they did quite a bit of publicity, this one...     

ape cape

the colleagues in my previous unit treated me to a belated birthday lunch. so sweet of them. the 'boss' who never came to be asked me to pick an ang pow out of three, it's her gift to me for my birthday. i had to pick the sweetest and most un-me necklace, ha ha. it's got the quintessential ribbon and the quintessential heart. i almost wanted to put it back and draw again so i won't rob someone of a chance to own such a sweet thang. apparently, each gift is unique. anyway, i kept it.

the aunty in the group said the cape's like batman's. she's the funniest, lah. she would ask us if we're wearing new clothes which we've probably worn a thousand times, but she didn't comment on the top i had on -- i didn't even realise i owned such a top, i probably hadn't worn it for 5 years or more. it's quite un-me, i almost couldn't step out of the house cos i couldn't decide if i should belt up or not. belts are one of those things that hinder movement. i'd wanted to belt up only cos it would serve to 'balance up' the proportion of the short high-necked top on my torso. and i think i lost my favourite oxfords :(  

oh happy day!

last coupla posts took place in jul. been busy so i had to backdate some posts.
i had a most sweet birthday. it's mostly been sweet these past years, actually.
i'm trying not to read too deep into things. but i think i just must give all glory to my lord.  
我真的不再一样了。

circa 2008?

i wore this dress with a pair of mock-croc lauren pumps yesterday. shoulda known better i might be crippled from the height. but the shoes weren't much higher heeled than these. that's cos i stood on them for about 5 hours. why torture myself? cos it's my birthday and i was trying to look my best for an important work.  

etsy

that's only half the truth, lah. 5 more months of such stress.
but to be honest, i don't mind going through that than go thru stress from school.
but. we know it's all just about the attitude. it's always been and it'll always be that.

here i come, august.

attn

i don't suppose i can get away with this look, right?

citizen couture

a colleague paid me/my hairstyle a compliment again. same term used. she even said she wanted to snap a picture of me/the hair. it was embarrassing. because she said that while we're in the office lift filled with people. was i glad they couldn't really see my face. they probably didn't know i existed until then. 

i could talk about this thing called attention. but i'm not sure where/how to start. it's an issue both shallow and deep, i think. 

讲来讲去

today's a day of nerves stretched to breaking point... ok, i exaggerate. things were finally resolved but i was left disappointed. i grew the guts to ask the middle managers some questions. i think i might get more disappointment. worst case scenario is i don't get answers and end up being labelled a rebel. i don't hope to win here. i already lost. i just wanted to understand why some things happened.

  

or maybe i did win. i mean, not to say this whole thing's about winning and losing, it's just a way of illustrating the struggle. i should be thankful that the task was completed, despite the blockages along the way. 

i'm pretty sure i won't understand one word when i look back at this post in the future. lol.

碧

colour blocking today? haha. the minty skirt's from a local market in shanghai. there're faint white and navy vertical lines spaced throughout. the short-sleeved outerwear's from an espirit outlet in kuala lumpur. my ex-supervisor's wearing a minty top from warehouse, so you can imagine what people would say when they noticed our clothes. one even said we blended with the toilet doors. lol.

which pair did i wear in the end? maybe i should've worn the ferragamos? which would you wear?

i'm really so very tempted to get those suede ankle boots on ASOS (and they're so sneaky, by posting them after discount codes expired, sheesh), even if i risk looking like a complete copycat. i've been coming across quite a number of blogs that look almost identical in the way the bloggers dress. maybe i'm just always too late to the party, as always.

eat air

What is ice cream?

Ice cream is simply a frozen dessert made from

• milk and/or cream
• sweeteners (like sugar)
• combined with flavoursome ingredients (like vanilla beans, nuts or fruits).

Besides the ingredients above, one of the most important components of ice cream is _____ ?

source

we learnt to make ice cream today. it's very easy indeed, but i doubt i'd try to make my own again. unless it's a group thing, that'd be more fun.

recipe for coconut ice cream (enough for two):

200ml milk

200ml coconut milk

50g sugar

me and my partner chose to do coconut since most chose vanilla and chocolate. for vanilla, the added ingredient is of course vanilla beans. did you know that vanilla pods are from an orchid plant? and where does one buy vanilla pods ah?

for chocolate, we're given hershey's. there's no fixed recipe since it's really up to the ice cream 'maker' how he or she wants it to turn out. apparently, pouring all the contents of the syrup into the mix isn't the way to go, since more sugars means the mix becomes harder to freeze. so it's the same if you want to add alcohol into the mix.

many seemed to find our ice cream salty. i suspect it's cos they ate it after trying out the sweeter vanilla and chocolate.

do you know the answer to the above question?

异样

it's true, isn't it, that a faceless or anon blog is just more mysterious or intriguing? i don't know what got into me to allow myself to show my face in this vast space. no, i don't mean that not showing my face would attract more readers.  

the hair is still not the most ideal cut. i want it shorter, and then i want it longer  i want bangs, and then i don't want them already. 

do i look ok in these big glasses? i personally think they're fine, that's why uncle tony re-cut new lens since the old ones won't fit. but the larger the lens, the more obvious the thickness at the sides. when i had long hair, my sil once commented that these frames didn't suit me. yesterday, an aunty colleague said they suited me. a young colleague (gen y or z) asked me why i was wearing these glasses (read: why did you do this to yourself?). anyway, i think i need new lens again. uncle tony shipped in some frames from japan and i liked how they looked on me. then again, that's cos the picture's  missing the thick lens. why can't i look good in glasses?

 

i'm wearing a top given by a colleague. i think i should've worn a flare skirt, yes?

but i love the pants. they're from gmarket. not the most comfy, in that they could feel warm in our weather, but they feel like they're nothing on and the silhouette's great.

the shoes were bought over from the guru. thank goodness they didn't fit her anymore, so i could own them. they go with practically everything in my wardrobe. i almost wanted to try wearing these boots.

  

collar colour

just realised that the colour of the men's shirts i've been lusting is the colour of blue = wp... ?? lol. 

i will admit that i'm one of those politically apathetic ones in my country. the recent events did give me something to think about. many thoughts in my head but as usual words fail me as soon as i state my case. wait, do i even have a case? i don't think anyone can claim to be neutral about ideologies, right?

truth be told, i was a little apprehensive when wp won the aljunied electoral division. but the weird thing's that if i get to choose, i'd say i belong more to the blue-collar than the white-collar workers (i found out only today that there's pink-collar too), in terms of the salary i'm drawing. heck, i think if i were a true blue manual labour kind of worker, i'd be earning more.

what was i saying? right. so if i belong to the lower-income group of people, shouldn't i be elated that the voice of this group of people could/should become more audible now? well, i felt i was already really blessed that i was not squeezed as tight as the middle-class. but maybe that's cos i'm single and my pay's not so low afterall? i've gone through worst times but that's mostly due to stupidity. so i can't quite get it when people complain about this and that. i did have to bear with something recently but to me i just didn't think to link it to the way the country's governed. the government did intervene eventually, things improved a little. i'm still in that situation today, though.

or. maybe. in the end, everything's indeed gotta do with the way the ruling party does things? we leave our brains at home. we mind our own business, self-interest comes first. but when things don't go our way, we whine and blame it on the government.

i still can't say why i felt that way when wp won. it could simply be about change. i have a love hate thing with this thing. i don't love change but i hate it when things remain unchanged for too long. 

算了

more drama at the office. this time one uncle asked me why i cut my hair this way. he asked it in mandarin, i could take it negatively. the message seemed to say: why did you do this to yourself? the other question he asked was whether this style's in trend.

i suppose i shouldn't be surprised that he'd thought so. cos i was one of those at the office who recently chopped off her locks; unfortunately i was the most recent 'copycat'. they seemed to have forgotten that i was the first to change my hairstyle two months back, and then the slew of dramatic hairstyle changes on other ladies followed. did i call them copycats? why should i? why should anyone??! 

i wish i should've just cut it real short the last time (it was indeed my plan but i had to chicken out). if only to escape all these. i've been inundated with 'accusatory' questions and statements if i was inspired by the other ladies and that i copied those actresses' styles in korean dramas (which i don't care for). well yes, i was  certainly inspired by what i've seen, and ok lah i'd  confess to being a copycat if that'd make them happy. how's it that i couldn't ever be capable of thinking up those things they came up with? am i abnormal or what?  

anyway i've been hoping that the hair turned up exactly the way it did on the next day after the cut. here, i styled it a little, and tucked the sides behind my ears, so there's more volume at the top, but because my locks are quite heavy, they'd collapse by day's end and end up looking asymmetrical, as shown in the last picture. on some days, the shape could look roundish (tsk). 

apart from that, i've been quite contented. i think i might even have finally found my look.

p/s: awesome responsibilities on this day.